The purpose of the “Back to Center” advice column is to provide perspectives for personal realignment and empowered living in these tyrannical times. Sarah encourages you to reach out to her with requests for advice about self-development and emotional and mental well-being. Please send your questions to&nbsp;<a href="mailto:advice@aflds.org">advice@aflds.org</a>. Anonymous and secure. Looking forward to hearing from you!For all other inquiries, please direct your questions to <a href="mailto:info@aflds.org" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">info@aflds.org</a><hr>My family and I recently moved to a new community. We have four children, ranging in age from 10 to 2. When I left my previous job because of the move, I decided I was not going to look for another position in our new area but would instead stay home with our youngest. I’ve always wanted to be a stay-at-home mom, but for a variety of reasons felt it wasn’t possible when our other children were very young.&nbsp;Now that my husband and I have made the decision that I’ll be home with our baby this time, I feel so happy but also conflicted at times. I learned very quickly that most families in our new community send their young ones to daycare — there really aren’t many other stay-at-home moms around as far as I know. Also, whenever I talk to new acquaintances about what I’m doing, I often feel they’re looking down on me and don’t understand where I’m coming from — like why would I want to stay home with my kid when I could go out and have a career? Or why would I want to isolate my son and hinder his socialization?&nbsp;I hate to admit it, but these conversations usually set off little whispers of doubt within me about the path I’ve chosen. Are they right? Am I making a mistake?&nbsp;Thank you for your question!The type of experience you’re describing is one that so many of us can identify with. We feel great about something we’ve decided to do. We’re so excited to start this new project, take on this new opportunity, make this change . . . until someone else’s voice enters the picture.&nbsp; “Are you sure you want to do that?” our friends or family members might ask. Or “You think you can really handle that right now?” Or “What if…?”&nbsp;Sound familiar?&nbsp;All of a sudden, the excitement turns a bit sour. We’re hit with a wave of doubt about that choice that felt so thrilling and right for us before, and now we can’t get that voice to leave us alone. It makes us doubt ourselves — maybe we don’t really know what we’re doing after all.It sounds like this is what’s happening for you. You say that you feel so happy about your choice to stay home with your child, but that happiness isn’t complete because you feel the opinions of others pulling at you. And I imagine the fact that you’re the only one you know of in your community who is choosing this path isn’t helping. Sometimes being different can be really uncomfortable.What is this struggle about, really? It’s the challenge of a lifetime: to stay aligned with who you are and what you believe in a world that is quite happy to pull you off course at every opportunity if you let it. Other people are always going to tell you what you should do, what’s best for you. The question is whether you are going to let them determine who you are, or whether you are going to define that for yourself.So, how can you stay aligned within yourself when your new friends start to question your decision? First, know why you’re doing what you’re doing. Take some quiet time to reflect on what it means to you to be home with your little one. Why does it make you happy? How does it positively impact your family? What does the time with your son give to you, to him? Why is being home right now more important to you than pursuing a career? Consider these questions and any others that come up for you and write down your answers.Then, when you’re talking with others and the topic of how you spend your time comes up, turn up the dial of awareness within yourself. Notice the thoughts and feelings that rise up for you when you hear others give their opinions on your choice. If those familiar doubts start to drag you down, say internally, “Wait a minute! This isn’t me!” and let the negative thoughts know that they are only allowed to pass through, not stay.When you’ve got a quiet moment later on, return to your writing about your “whys”. Read them, feel your own answers within you, look at your beautiful little son, breathe, recenter. Talk to your husband or a friend who gets you and say out loud what you know to be true. You are the one who gets to shape your reality, not other people. Before long, that deep sense of happiness and certainty about your choice will return.Now, all that being said about outside opinions, I would like to offer you mine, if I may (take it or leave it as you will!). I think you are doing a brave, amazing thing. You are giving your son and your family such a gift. You are making yourself available to help mold a new little person for good, and that has the power to change the world. Stay the course — you’re doing great! All the best.****Previous columns:<ul><li><a href="https://www.frontline.news/post/back-to-center-i-let-myself-be-talked-into-a-medical-procedure-i-didn-t-want" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘I let myself be talked into a medical procedure I didn’t want'</a></li><li><a href="https://www.frontline.news/post/back-to-center-i-encountered-a-slew-of-racist-hate-messages-online" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘I encountered a slew of racist hate messages online’</a></li><li><a href="https://www.frontline.news/post/back-to-center-i-want-to-take-our-family's-health-back-into-our-own-hands" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘I want to take our family’s health back into our own hands'</a></li><li><a href="https://www.frontline.news/post/back-to-center-even-though-things-are-better-with-covid-my-friends-are-still-on-medication" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘Even though things are better with COVID, my friends are still on medication’</a></li><li><a href="https://www.frontline.news/post/back-to-center-I-am-awake-now-but-I-wasn-t-always" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘I am “awake” now, but I wasn’t always'</a></li><li><a href="https://www.frontline.news/post/back-to-center-my-daughter-is-worried-for-her-friends-who-got-the-covid-shot" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'My daughter is worried for her friends who got the COVID shot'</a></li><li><a href="https://frontline.news/post/back-to-center-how-can-people-call-themselves-christians-and-believe-that-these-things-are-okay" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘How can people call themselves Christians and believe these things are okay?’</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-i-m-alone-for-the-holidays-for-the-very-first-time" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘I’m alone for the holidays for the very first time'</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-what-s-a-formerly-proud-american-to-do-these-days" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘What’s a formerly proud American to do these days?'</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-how-can-i-extend-forgiveness-for-all-the-covid-atrocities-when-it-still-hurts-so-much" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘How can I extend forgiveness for all the COVID atrocities when it still hurts so much?’</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-i-long-to-help-my-daughter-connect-with-god-in-these-times" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'I long to help my daughter connect with God in these times'</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-is-it-irresponsible-to-think-of-having-another-child-in-today-s-world" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Is it irresponsible to think of having another child in today's world?</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-i-want-my-son-to-have-strong-male-role-models" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘I want my son to have strong male role models’</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-our-son-has-secretly-been-in-the-process-of-gender-transition">‘Our son has secretly been in the process of gender transition’</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-i-wonder-if-the-sacrifices-i-and-my-fellow-soldiers-made-were-worth-it" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘I wonder if the sacrifices I and my fellow soldiers made were worth it’</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-i-know-scripture-approves-of-2nd-amendment-rights-but-the-idea-leaves-me-uneasy" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘I know Scripture approves of 2nd Amendment rights, but the idea leaves me uneasy’</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-i-was-an-approval-seeking-people-pleaser" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘I was an approval-seeking people-pleaser’</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-god-is-a-god-of-justice-right-wheres-my-justice" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'God is a God of justice, right? Where’s my justice?'</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-ive-tried-my-best-to-be-faithful-and-live-a-holy-life-now-i-dont-know-what-to-believe" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘I’ve tried my best to be faithful and live a holy life; now I don’t know what to believe’</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-kids-gravitate-toward-honest-answers-even-when-theyre-tough-answers" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'Kids gravitate toward honest answers, even when they’re tough answers'</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-i-used-to-be-a-pretty-positive-person-but-the-world-is-different-now" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'I used to be a pretty positive person, but the world is different now'</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-do-i-have-an-obligation-to-say-something-to-my-friend-who-is-about-to-inject-her-one-year-old" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'Do I have an obligation to say something to my friend who is about to inject her one-year-old?'</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-how-do-i-respond-to-wild-hatred" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'How do I respond to wild hatred?'</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-all-my-friends-have-abandoned-me" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘All my friends have abandoned me’</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-who-am-i-to-build-a-better-world" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘Who am I to build a better world?’</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-the-world-does-not-have-to-understand-or-approve-of-your-choices" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'The world does not have to understand or approve of your choices'</a></li><li><a href="https://www.americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-i-get-tired-and-overwhelmed" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'I get tired and overwhelmed'</a></li><li><a href="https://www.americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-i-vacillate-between-feeling-inspired-and-useless" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'I vacillate between feeling inspired and useless'</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinenews.com/post/back-to-center-i-pity-the-people-creating-the-lies" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘I pity the people creating the lies’</a></li><li><a href="https://aflds.org/news/post/back-to-center-the-anger-and-hurt-feelings-are-costing-you-too-much/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘The anger and hurt feelings are costing you too much’</a></li><li><a href="https://aflds.org/news/post/back-to-center-people-who-once-treated-each-other-with-so-much-love-and-kindness-are-now-at-odds/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘People who once treated each other with so much love and kindness are now at odds’</a></li><li><a href="https://aflds.org/news/post/back-to-center-struggling-with-my-relationship-with-god-since-covid/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘Struggling with my relationship with God since COVID’</a></li><li><a href="https://aflds.org/news/post/back-to-center-i-have-lost-confidence-in-our-healthcare-system-including-my-own-personal-doctors/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'I have lost confidence in our healthcare system, including my own personal doctors'</a></li><li><a href="https://aflds.org/news/post/back-to-center-can-you-forgive-yourself-for-the-years-you-couldnt-be-there-with-your-daughter/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'Can you forgive yourself for the years you couldn’t be there with your daughter?'</a></li><li><a href="https://aflds.org/news/post/back-to-center-my-wife-is-willing-to-take-the-sacrifice-for-her-sister-and-im-sick-to-my-stomach-thinking-about-it/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'My wife is willing to take the sacrifice for her sister and I'm sick to my stomach thinking about it'</a></li><li><a href="https://aflds.org/news/post/back-to-center-i-deeply-regret-taking-the-vaccine/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'I deeply regret taking the vaccine'</a></li><li><a href="https://aflds.org/news/post/back-to-center-married-39-years-and-i-thought-we-were-on-the-same-page-when-it-came-to-things-that-mattered-most/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'Married 39 years and I thought we were on the same page when it came to things that mattered most'</a></li><li><a href="https://aflds.org/news/post/back-to-center-how-do-i-repair-this-relationship-or-accept-that-i-may-never-see-my-son-again/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">‘How do I repair this relationship or accept that I may never see my son again?’</a></li><li>‘<a href="https://aflds.org/news/post/back-to-center-how-can-i-stop-fear-from-controlling-my-every-thought-and-ruining-my-dreams/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">How can I stop fear from controlling my every thought and ruining my dreams?’</a></li><li><a href="https://aflds.org/news/post/how-can-i-pursue-my-dream-to-find-the-person-to-marry-when-its-so-hard-to-connect-with-new-people-because-of-covid/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'How can I pursue my dream to find the person to marry, when it's so hard to connect with new people because of COVID?'</a></li><li><a href="https://www.americasfrontlinedoctors.org/news/post/how-can-i-feel-safe-these-days/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">'How can I feel safe these days?'</a></li><li><a href="https://americasfrontlinedoctors.org/news/post/advice-column-premier-back-to-center/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Advice column premier: Back to Center</a></li></ul>&nbsp;Sarah encourages you to reach out to her with requests for advice! Please send your questions to <a href="mailto:advice@aflds.org">advice@aflds.org</a>. &nbsp;Anonymous and secure.<figure class="image image-style-align-right image_resized" style="width:429.5px;"><img src="https://res.cloudinary.com/aflds/image/upload/q_auto,w_800,h_800,c_limit,f_webp/q_auto,w_800,h_800,c_limit,f_webp/q_auto,w_800,h_800,c_limit,f_webp/q_auto,w_800,h_800,c_limit,f_webp/q_auto,w_800,h_800,c_limit,f_webp/q_auto,w_800,h_800,c_limit,f_webp/q_auto,w_800,h_800,c_limit,f_webp/q_auto,w_800,h_800,c_limit,f_webp/q_auto,w_800,h_800,c_limit,f_webp/q_auto,w_800,h_800,c_limit,f_webp/v1665770138/Sarah_Perron_pic_8308c4ba4b_718fe99fe6.jpg"></figure>&nbsp;Sarah Perron is a Certified Transformational Life Coach. Her passion is to help people create a powerful vision for their lives, identify and eliminate anything that holds them back, and step into their own unique greatness and mission in the world. She believes deeply in the power of coaching to bring fresh perspectives, ideas, and motivation to anyone who wants to thrive in life. Sarah works with clients one-on-one and in group coaching programs and presents exciting workshops on self-development topics. You can follow her on her YouTube channel <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCTlPdMbwe8QAfP5NUR3GRRQ" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Find Your Fire</a>.You are invited to book a complimentary coaching call with Sarah! Please visit&nbsp;<a href="https://nam12.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fcalendly.com%2Fsarahperroncoaching%2F45min&amp;data=04%7C01%7Csones%40aflds.org%7C31d93fd5f0224c8ae79008da065d1c0c%7Cb86874a894e144f8891fcd4fa7ac80e6%7C1%7C0%7C637829294605931269%7CUnknown%7CTWFpbGZsb3d8eyJWIjoiMC4wLjAwMDAiLCJQIjoiV2luMzIiLCJBTiI6Ik1haWwiLCJXVCI6Mn0%3D%7C3000&amp;sdata=ypWrVm9gI8jDagbivpnoHD1M%2F%2F4CKS4v1YoGUWUGpMQ%3D&amp;reserved=0" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">https://calendly.com/sarahperroncoaching/45min</a>&nbsp;to choose a time that's convenient&nbsp;for you. She looks forward to meeting you!

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